Week # 14: Getting to Know Your “Inner Roommate”
Last week I introduced you to “Annie” my “inner roommate.” As I mentioned, I first became aware of this voice in my head when I read Michael Singer’s book, The Untethered Soul. This week, I’d like to go a little deeper into this idea. Some readers may know immediately what I’m talking about when I mention this inner voice, which is constantly chattering away in our head. Others may be thinking, “What? I don’t hear a voice all the time.” My theory is that if you aren’t aware of this voice, it’s because your “Annie” has been talking so much, for so long, that you no longer notice her or him ;-).
That’s where I was when I first read Singer’s book. I had been listening to Annie for so long, I didn’t even know she was there. Looking back, I realize that little voice was even coaching me when I was a child.
It’s important to know that this voice is trying to protect you. But in the process, the voice becomes the source of fear, self-doubt, insecurity, and a multitude of other things that hold us back and prevent us from becoming our best self.
Think about this, if fear and self-doubt didn’t get in the way, how would your life be different? Would you have a different career? Would you live in another town? State? Country? How would life be different for you if you weren’t afraid to __________.
Once I began to pay attention, suddenly I was able to recognize the voice. Not all the time, but with time, I grew to know and understand this voice more and more. I began to understand that she was still the little girl in me, and she lived in fear. This made me less angry and less resentful of her. Understanding Annie made me want to love her instead of being angry with her.
My inner voice often disguises herself as judgment, anxiety, insecurity, overwhelm or worry.
Recognizing when Annie is trying to control my life has been a great DISCOVERy for me. Now, when I notice that I’m feeling those emotions related to fear, I can interrupt Annie and all the thoughts she’s flooding through my mind. I’m able to take a deep breath and consider what I’m feeling, why I’m feeling it and decide how I’d like to feel instead.
Annie and I have been getting to know each other for about six years now. Does she still try to control my life? Absolutely! But I’m on to her! I’m getting better at noticing when she shows up. And when she does, instead of being angry, resentful, or annoyed, I try to be curious. Why does she think I need to be protected? What does she think I need? Sometimes, she’s right! But more often, she’s just afraid or insecure.
So, I go back to that question, how would life be different for you if you weren’t afraid? My life is very different! I’m living in Spain, learning to love myself (and Annie) more, and I’m living my best life ever! I wish you YOUR BEST LIFE EVER!
With Love and Gratitude,
Charlotte